Breast Cancer Stage IIa (Chemotherapy Treatment Day 12)

9 more days before the 2nd cycle. I will not sound right but i cannot wait to have it even thought i am afraid to go through another terrible ordeal. After this one it will be 4 more cycle.

I am hurt that my husband will not be around for a week when i am on the drugs next 2 weeks. He will be participating in the Borneo Safari 4x4 challenge support team which he has planned for few months. I feel guilty for asking him to stay but how can i survive without him, who is going to drive me to the hospital and back home, who will play with the kids when i cannot for 4 days, who will take care and support me when i am in pain.
I am so hurt that i am not his priority. Why cannot he understand that the 4x4 challenge is an yearly event, he still can go next year but your wife is critically ill (it is not an yearly thing that people get sick).

If the situation is reverse, he will be my first priority. I cannot bare to see him suffer. Maybe this shows that i love him more!  If he really just leave me and suffer alone, i do not think i can forgive him.